A
heart warming smile
from
a stranger
with
love behind
the
twinkle in his eye
he
could be a rich man
he
could be poor
he
could have had struggles
he
could have suffered
his
story unknown
in
this moment
it's
simple
Joy
in
a smile.
Which
rather allows me to take a huge step of artistic licence to say what
I wanted to say regardless of the prompt...is that naughty?
When
I woke up this morning I was thinking of what I said here...When
people dismiss suffering it can make the suffering feel even
worse...sometimes we need to speak out to show people how their
ignorance is harmful. Compassion and at least an attempt to
understand can go a long way towards dealing with it, especially in
moments where it threatens to overwhelm us again...
After
speaking to my mum and us having a lovely light-hearted and serious
chat I wrote my status for today.
*Our
biggest enemy is fear...it attacks our well being worse than any
other thing. The physical shite we go through is always made worse by
how much fear it evokes within us...
All
our most challenging emotions have fear at the base of them and all
our uplifting emotions are given their wings by the love that is
always available to us when not cloaked by our fear...
Our
hope and our guiding light to get through the darkest times we face
as individuals and as a combination which is the whole of
humanity...including those rotten gits that stir the fear the
worst...or something like that!
I've
been dancing with fear the last few months...I have had many moments
where I thought I would buckle and maybe even die...every moment I
get fear out of the way I can breathe and I can manage to do
something towards self care.
I
have been working on facing my fears for a long time. Sometimes just
experiencing them and finding our way back out the other side gives
us insights that we share and help remind us all how much fear can
cripple us and how much loving compassion shared helps us all...our
fears can be sparked by similar things, buttons of past pain and
loss...I wrote on my wall the other day I am not brave, I have just
somehow managed to get through all the shite so far...at that point I
felt quite low. We all have more worth than we are often shown and by
ourselves at times as well...when we support each other with
outpourings of love and understanding we can inspire each other to
keep on trucking through....*
I
have had a better day than for months. Maybe I really am on the road
to recovery this time. I rang mum again a couple of hours ago. I read
out what I had written to her and my voice was stronger than she has
heard it for a long time. She wanted her friend to hear it too and so
I read it out again. Mum's friend often says what a waste of my
talents by not being well enough to do much with them. I said it
isn't a waste, it is unlikely I would have written that without the
suffering I went through to come to that deeper understanding of what
I already know!
I
wonder if it makes the messages I feel the need to share in any way
more powerful due to the suffering it took to get there? At the
moment, I am in a state of love and understanding where my fear of
continued suffering kept me trapped in a very limited state. I also
wonder at the potential for increased well being as I let love wash
away the fears my experience of life has challenged me with,
including the fear of being treated as worthless due to being ill.
Also of being a burden to those who care for me.
Fear
is a cycle we can break out of from time to time, I think it is when
we respect where the fear has come from and love anyway, trusting
that we can free ourselves from fear, even deep rooted ones...or
something like that...it'll bite me on the bum again and become a
pain in my neck and I may find myself struggling to breathe when fear
gets me back in a grip, drowning in my sorrow at a life ripped out of
me, again I will tell fear, I understand why you are here, eventually
or sooner than later and I will be love again, with love I can reach
for the stars and find my dreams stuffed down the back of the sofa...
Picture
prompt found at...http://www.morguefile.com/
At times, fear has caused me to do what I should not do in worry of what could happen. This is the result of trying to head off something that isn't even a threat to begin with. I wish I were dauntless!
ReplyDeletehttp://joycelansky.blogspot.com
It takes time to learn this and fear will always be a part of our lives just a case of making friends with it and remembering when suffering is happening fear is showing us we need to make peace with something...smiles x
DeleteSometimes we all have a hard time shining through our fear when we are suffering. I think you are doing a beautiful job.
ReplyDeleteThank you...smiles
Delete